Hi everyone... and Happy Father's Day to all the Dads here on the Stream.... I was thinking of a new post to write for Father's Day but I don't think I can ever top the post I did last year about my own father who has been gone now for over 12 years. I still miss him every single day... so from Father's Day 2006...
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Top Ten Things I Learned From My Dad.
Well, it's another Father's Day and my thoughts obviously have turned to my father. He passed away 11 years ago at a relatively young age, leaving the rest of his family shocked and dismayed that he was taken away so soon.
But I say that my father is alive and well in spirit. I seem to have taken on more and more of his characteristics as I have grown older. It's eerie the similarities between my dad and I that are manifesting themselves in me.
So, in honor of my dad, I offer up the following top ten list of....
Things I learned from my dad.
*drumroll*
10. My dad taught me the importance of appreciating one's heritage. He would often tell tales of how our ancestors were of "good English stock". I wasn't exactly sure what he meant when he told me that, but I was quite fascinated when he would harken back further to when my ancestors were "Picts", faces painted blue, leaping out of trees onto unsuspecting minions of some tyrannical king. Now, THAT got my attention. That was cool! :)
9. My dad also taught me the importance of history. Dad was an avid reader and he loved to read military history especially, which is mostly what I read now. He was really in to the American Revolution, The Civil War and World War II especially, and I started borrowing from his library at a young age and I was probably far more knowledgeable on history than your average 10 year old, thanks to dad's influence.
8. My dad taught me the importance of using proper English language. He was a real stickler for the proper use of words and their pronunciations. He didn't tolerate the use of the word "ain't" whatsoever, which was a bit tough on his kids who were being raised in the deep south. Now, it WAS ok to use improper English language to add color to a story or an analogy you were using. You just had to be quite clear about "talking correctly" when conversing.
7. My dad taught me the importance of religion and the church. Dad wasn't overly pious or overtly religious all the time, but he raised us in the habits of regular church attendance, and in using prayer, especially "grace" at mealtime. He loved God and he loved all the sacramental rituals of the Lutheran and Episcopal church. He just wasn't what you might call "evangelical" and I am the same way. My dad was more of a pastoral Christian and that is how I walk in my spirituality and faith as well.
6. My dad taught me the importance of the science of geography. He probably was the person that introduced me to maps at a very young age and I have developed such a keen awareness of the world and places and why certain places are important from studying maps and endless reading of "National Geographic". It's a magazine that he loved and that I have always loved as long as I can remember. He would often go into incredible detail about the places we traveled and why they were like they were, and I will always remember him for his love of mountains. He loved Appalachia and I am in love with it now, myself.
5. My dad also taught me the importance of appreciating music, especially classical music. He had an extensive collection of albums, mostly classical and jazz and he would take us to the orchestra when he could. There is no doubt that my interest of music came directly from him. I would steal a few albums into my room and I remember listening to alot of classical music growing up. He also greatly appreciated my music and I fondly remember him hearing me play guitar once and commenting that I was like a fine craftsman who could produce pieces of furniture that actually had the quality of art, and then went into a dissertation of the difference between an artisan and a craftsman as only dad would, and could.
4. My dad really taught and instilled in me a sense of common courtesy and manners. He was very firm on "sir" and "mam" and would give me pointers on common etiquette. He was really adamant about having the dinner table correctly set, and he gave me a real appreciation of how just a little effort in manners could go a long way in the way other people perceived you as being well bred and couth.
3. Dad taught me to love the outdoors. He really had a deep appreciation about nature and wildlife. We would hike. We would fish...alot! We would hunt. We would go camping. I wish we could have done more of these things but he accomplished his mission in myself in that he has instilled an absolute respect and adoration of the outdoors and enjoying the wilder areas of the world.
2. My dad taught me the importance of hard work and discipline. He was always teaching me the reasons WHY he was working me so hard in the yard and WHY it was better to do the work first and then play. Most of his efforts fell on deaf ears as I was just consumed with being lazy and loose but he did finally get his point across, decades later as I finally understand the importance of not just DOING hard work and trying difficult things but WHY it's important to one's sense of self and to stand as an example to others as a man of integrity and as a man who can be depended on by others. All this is wrapped in self discipline. A fairly new concept to me, but God bless dad for planting the seeds which seem to now finally be flowering with the help of a great step father and other mentors. I'm what ya call a late bloomer! I'm just saying!
1. ....and with the "I'm just saying!" comment we come to the last, but certainly not the least thing he taught me and that is to be oneself and to relish in the eccentricities of life. Dad had the driest sense of humor on earth and he was always just a little "different" about things. Some of this is not even tangible enough to explain to those who didn't know him intimately. He was just "dad". Whether that was mowing the lawn in a torn to hell collared shirt, with shorts and black dress socks or rousting the kids out of bed on Christmas morning with the blaring of stereophonic bagpipes. He was an individual in the truest sense and he didn't really care about putting on airs about whatever "normal" was around those that were closest to him. His most eccentric moments are some of my fondest memories.. from that horrid tomato pudding he would always cook up, to his reading of the seemingly endless "Great Thanksgiving" from the "Book Of Common Prayer" to a room full of impatient and hungry family with the buffet of Thanksgiving dinner spread out on the table. He was wonderfully creative. He wrote beautifully. He had an appreciation for the beauty and love in the world in his own unique way and I, just like him will openly cry when I am deeply touched. He was all heart at times, a bit persnickity and grouchy at other times, and just a very special man to all of us that live on without him.
I miss you and love you, Dad.
Happy Father's Day.
