....It's odd, but I miss the madness of insomnia in a way. I have been sleeping quite well in the last few weeks for the most part; In bed most nights by midnight at the latest.... an unusually early turn in time for me. I was such a denizen of the small hours over the last couple of years and while it was sometimes tough on me to be worn down by exhaustion time and time again, I miss all the extra hours of the day I could have beyond what folks with normal sleeping habits would get. I had my late night habits (mostly reading, writing, or blogging) and my late night friends (They never sleep and they can chat you up with gusto at 4 in the morning.:) ) and my late night diet of milk and sweets... but those times seem to have passed, although temporarily perhaps. I have gone through some major changes in the last couple of months.... I am finally free of the anti-depressant, which was hell coming off of, but I seem to be in the clear now. I also dropped my blood pressure meds, and while that may be a short term experiment, it IS nice to get up in the morning and to not have to remember to take ANYTHING at all!
So, I am getting back to my old self in a way, but I don't have that "easy come-easy go" swagger that I used to have... I think I am suffering from a sort of shell shock from my big life changes of the last few years and I am real edgy and a bit shy about stepping out right now.....Of course, life just keeps piling on, no matter what changes I seem to make within myself... I am finally physically well enough to get back into the real estate gig, but then on Monday, my car died on the side of the road and now I am waiting to hear from the mechanic where I had it towed, for the southern drawled message of the apocalypse that "Ya naa-eed a new engun, boy!" .... I don't know a whole lot about cars but I know that this is SERIOUS... and of course I pray to God for mercy with this.... that somehow the greasy guy looking at my Honda will be astounded that it simply repaired itself overnight! It's a miracle!
I doubt it, though.
Well, shit. I've been through all kinds of things before and a dead car can surely be handled too. It's a leap of faith that I will somehow come out ok. I have to make things ok, what choice do I have?
So, in honor of worrying about my car and a little late night coffee, I am staying up a bit late tonight to send out some photos I took today and then to lay in bed and read......
In the well worn comfort of my insomnia.
Peace,
Randy
